May 2013
17 posts
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I’m bored and procrastinating and I found this. I’m not one to believe in zodiac signs and fortunes and things like that but this seems to describe me 100%
Those born under the sign of Cancer, ruled by the mysterious Moon, are one of the zodiac’s enigmas. It is fair to say that most Cancers are a bundle of contradictions. Compassionate and caring with friends, family and lovers,...
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*insert depressing title here*
So this is unfair. She uses Harry Potter references. She has amazing tattoos. She has a pokeball. She is beautiful. She recognises my “awkward smile”. We talk every night. She has a fucking girlfriend.
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Silly little me (5 years ago)
With the new Facebook Timeline setup, those notes which I wrote about 5 years ago popped up to the top of my profile. Before deleting all of them, I read through some of those old questionnaire things where you have to tick off what you have done or answer questions truthfully and shit like that.
One of the questions was, “Are you gay?” and my answer was “nope, nope and...
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Well now I'm confused
In celebration of our end of lectures and the beginning of exam period, I went to my friend’s house for a drinking fest. I’d been talking to that girl I’ve liked for ages (we’d been talking for a while) so I invited her to come as I was saying goodbye (knowing that she wouldn’t come).
But holy fuck she accepted the invite and came and joined us. It was actually quite...
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“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that...”
– Dumbledore.
If this is true, then somewhere, in some other universe, there is another me who is unbelievably happy. This life in this universe however…needs a bit of work!
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Brownie for your thoughts...
Well my big plans of studying hard and starting a big report for last night failed epically when my friend invited me over for brownies.
As far as flavour went, they were the best I’ve had and I could feel the effect within about 30 minutes.
We filled our night with making chicken (a bit of a fail), watching Adventure Time, laughing at stupid things and staring at stuff.
I couldn’t...
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Tonight
Tonight, I am armed with a full-to-the-brim glass of wine, my angry bird pj’s and Imagine Me and You. Sounds like an exciting night, I’d say.
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Well that sucks
I’m only writing this on here because I need to get it out of my head and if I tell any of my friends, they will think that I am not (slowly) getting over this girl.
So I guess now we’re buddies, which is cool but slightly frustrating considering I still have a crush on her even though she HAS a girlfriend. But she smses me every day. I want to be the one that initiates the daily...
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The Future
I want to be happy. I want to have a loving family- two amazing children (yes, i admit it) and a wife I adore.
I want a stressful yet rewarding job. I want to cut open dying animals and save their lives. I want to tell weeping owners that their beloved pet will live to catch another ball or will gallop around a paddock for many years to come. I want to work with wildlife and watch how they...
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You Tumblr people are actually fucking amazing.
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Lost
So yesterday I had a break down. Lately, everything (and I mean, everything) has been going wrong.
I told my mom about what has been going through my head and how down I’ve been lately. How everything I was, everything I had a year ago, is slipping through my fingers. How I’m not enjoying varsity at all because it really IS NOT INTERESTING to me. How riding used to be the one thing I...
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What a girl wants
I’m confused. Partly because it’s nearly midnight and I’ve been studying for 5 hours straight. Partly because of this girl.
We had a chat earlier in the week and she now knows I’m gay and I know she has a girlfriend. Which is cool, really.
But because I had a crush on her, I’ve been trying to keep my distance so I can get over her. But she keeps smsing me! Literally...
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My Dream
Me and Voldemort were pals and because of the whole wizard-war thing that was going on, he was going to give me his yacht. To prove to him I would be responsible will it, I had to undergo some tests.
I had to wander through an old mansion with many rooms (half of which were filled with musicians), I had to walk away from someone I shouldn’t care about, I had to roam a big, scary garden and...
April 2013
19 posts
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So.....
So, it turns out, she has a girlfriend. Have to admit, I’m pretty bummed but hopefully after a night of drinking and story-swopping with some friends, I think I’ll be fine,
Eventually
At least I have a gay friend. yay :)
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I get drunk to forget. But on the other hand, I hate forgetting.
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Tuesday blues
I’m feeling like death today. Must be from the MD I took on the weekend. Although it might be just because I’ve had a crappy morning.
I missed my bus by a minute, walked to the next closest stop and had to wait in a queue for half an hour. I didn’t get a chance to complete the practical report I had to hand in at 8am because I missed my bus and arrived late to varsity.
I...
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Life
Life is looking up. Sort of.
I have brandy stocked in my room now.
Tomorrow is Jungala, my last trance party before exams. Tomorrow is also going to be filled with drugs, more booze and mind-numbing music. I can’t wait to forget about my silly little problems.
Anonymous asked: definitely ask the girl out. :)
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“Look at you. You’re young. And you’re scared. Why are you so scared? Stop being...”
– Louise Flory (via sickur)
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Problems.
It’s quite sad. I keep writing down stuff happening in my life but then erasing it again because I don’t want my few followers to think I’m depressed all the time. I’m not, it’s just that my blog is a space for me to moan and groan about the little things in life and so I decided: fuck it. Here are my problems:
I like this girl and I doubt she likes me because who am...
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Rewrote this 100 times so who cares what the title...
I’m trying to be positive here. It’s fucking difficult but at least I’m trying.
There’s this girl i really like. Yes it seems like the same old story that happened to me a year ago BUT with a few major changes.
1) She’s actually gay which helps matters quite considerably
2) I’ve told people that I like her so it’s not roaming around in my head, getting...
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Gandalfs the great
Last night, after forcing my friend to watch Mean Girls (he’d never seen it before and most of us, coming from an all girls school that didn’t take its LO periods seriously, have seen it hundreds of times), we missioned to Gandalfs (a club in Obz).
I convinced my friends to go because of the cheap entrance fee and the free-drinks-til-2am rule and the fact that we haven’t been...
Anonymous asked: what do you look like?
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I really am terrible at flirting with girls.
Reblog if you think gay marriage should be legal.
preciouscreativeminds:
awindowtothewest:
the-queen-of-anchors:
HOLY FUCK THE NOTES.
If you’re my follower and you don’t reblog this we have a problem~
HOLY SHIT LOOK AT THE NOTES
you better reblog this.
reblog EVERY TIME THIS IS ON YOUR DASH .
Reblog this or I’m judging you.
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Back in the land of civilisation.
Back from the camp today. It was actually really awesome - way better than I expected it to be.
We were at the West Coast National Park and had to do field work every day to collect research for reports that we have to hand in at the end of the semester. My pracs included throwing out long nets, catching and counting the young fish that we caught, and stomping through hectic bushveld- complete...
Anonymous asked: Hey, just wanted to say that I don't know you but I check your blog every now and again to see how you're doing. It sounds like you're going through some hard things and I just wanted you to know that there's someone wishing you luck. Have a great day :)
March 2013
14 posts
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Camp
Today I am off for a 5 day field camp for two of my varsity courses. We’re going to stay in Langebaan and only God knows what the hell we’ll be doing there for the rest of my holiday!
I’m mixed feelings about it- let’s see…
Goodbye til Monday!
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Here
Is it weird to feel completely apart from everything and everyone in your life? I feel like I’m here and they’re here but we’re not in the same “here”. I’m alone.
The truth is, I’m actually not. I have a loving family and awesome friends but I feel like I’m travelling at a different pace to all of them. They’re moving on with things, and...
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The “My Drunk Kitchen” videos are amazing. Hannah Hart is brilliantly hilarious. Makes me happy watching the videos!
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Alone
I’m feeling quite alone. I’m trying to get out of this weird phase I’ve been in for a while, but every time I feel like I’m finally escaping its hold, something drags me back down.
Maybe I need change.
Actually, I think I need someone. I’m tired of sitting on the sideline, watching everyone else be happy, while I set aside my own needs for theirs. Time for some...
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Apparently I don’t “look gay”. I don’t know what that means, really….
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3 Days until D-Day
Wednesday is my D-day for happiness. Tests will be over, pracs will be handed in and holidays will begin! Although it’s a very short holiday, it’s filled with my first gay bar experience (hopefully) and a 4 day varsity field trip along the coast which should be fun enough.
3 MORE DAYS
Anonymous asked: Hello dear, how are you doing? :)
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That moment when all you want to do is smoke a joint… but you have to do a biology practical filled with drawings of seaweeds and algae.
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There’s this girl. I want to be with her. But I don’t know how to go about it…
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Straight guy friend: I have to admit, I would bend over for Jimmy Hendricks.
Straight girl friend (looking at me): well we would go lesb...(looks at me again) well I would go lesbian for Emma Watson.
It was quite an amusing conversation
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Hope from an old diary
I found my old diary from 2011 last night.
This was the year when I was just coming out to myself and hadn’t told anyone and was still obsessed with that one girl.
I realise now how screwed up I was! I drank to the point of drunkenness on my own, in my room, while watching the L Word or some lesbian youtube clips at least 3 times a week.
I repeatedly wrote down how I didn’t want to be gay and...
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Friends
It’s hard to be a friend right now. For some reason, everyone is pissing me off beyond measure. I’m going to become a hermit and never go outside again
